“The Quality of Your Communication is the Quality of Your Life.” (Tony Robbins)
Welcome to our ‘Communication Skills’ Series. We will be discussing the best personal development ideas on how to improve your communication skills.
Communication is Life
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IDEAS FROM ALL THE GREATS
Surely, I can get by without being Tony Robbins or Barrack Obama.
I’m not a politician or a high level business executive. I’m not a football coach who needs to motivate or inspire players.
I’m just me and I can get by.
This is a monologue that played out in my mind once upon a time.
But pretty soon things began to unravel.
Picture the following three scenarios.
You walk into a room and you see someone you really want to have a conversation with. You’ve been waiting to speak to them for a long time. As it happens, you have a conversation but it doesn’t go down at all as you wanted it to. You couldn’t even get across the main point you wanted to make.
You’re sitting within a group of people at work. You have a killer idea and you wait for your chance to express it. You’re patient. Too patient. The chance has passed. They’ve moved on to the next item on the agenda.
An opportunity presents itself. It’s exactly what you’ve been looking for, almost too good to be true. You look into a bit more. You want to do as much research as you possibly can. So you do. Gradually, you start convincing yourself that you are out of your depth. This opportunity is beyond you. You’re under-qualified. You won’t be able to handle it. So you don’t even bother going for it.
I asked you to picture these situations because they all occurred. They happened to me once upon a time. Moreover, you may have experienced them too, in some form or other.
They are symbolic of three reasons that communication skills rule your life.
1. Communication Skills and You
The way in which we speak to ourselves ultimately dictates our lives. If the conversations you have with yourself are negative and disparaging then what will that mean for the choices you make in life? Will you be bold and courageous? Will you make decisions that back your ability? Or will you decide things based on self-doubt?
The things we say to ourselves will shape our decisions which will ultimately shape our outcomes: the things we experience and the results we achieve.
If you consider where you are in life today it will undoubtedly be a result of the way you communicate with yourself.
When we are not aware or in control of these conversations then there is no telling where they will lead you.
To get greater control over your life and the trajectory of your future then you need to master the art of self-communication.
And this begins with self-awareness.
2. Communication Skills and Your Social Life
As John Donne once wrote: no man (or woman) is an Island. And he wasn’t wrong. All the relationships that make up who you are – your friendships and even your enemies – are built upon communication.
In fact, the very nature of those relationships are dependent on communication. A miscommunication here and there can lead to drastic changes in your relationships. It can be the difference between friend and foe. If you think about it, even your circle of friends itself was dependent on your ability to communicate.
If they’re not the friends you want (or you don’t have any) then you need to start taking your conversation skills seriously.
3. Communication Skills and Your Professional Life
So you may not be Barrack Obama, Tony Robbins nor the modern day Vince Lombardi.
But communication skills, or lack of them, are dictating your life in the most powerful way.
The way you’re regarded at work is dependent on how you communicate.
Do people take you seriously?
Do you get long with your co-workers?
Do you get your points across effectively enough?
Have you ever send (or received) an email that was ambiguous and didn’t really make clear what needed to be done?
That’s bad communication and it wreaks havoc with work effectiveness, work relationships and possibly even your chances of professional development.
So it doesn’t matter what your occupation is or what level you find yourself – communication skills are having a direct impact on your professional life.
So, what’s the answer?
Become an Island and silence your internal voice.
That’s an answer I suppose.
Alternatively, start taking your conversation skills seriously and work on improving them.
In the process you will empower the true you.
That’s what this series is all about.
See you on the next post!